That Dita, oh, she sure knows how to make a splash, don’t she? I seen some pictures of her wedding dress, the one she wore when she married that Marilyn Manson fella. Lord have mercy, that dress was somethin’ else. Not what you’d call a regular wedding dress, no sir. It was purple, bright purple, like a grape soda. Ain’t never seen a bride wear purple before.

They say it was made by some fancy designer, Vivienne Westwood, I reckon. Must have cost a pretty penny, that thing. All that shiny fabric, looked like it could stand up on its own. And the size of it! You could fit three of me in that skirt, easy. Big and poofy, like them fancy ladies wore in them old-timey movies.
I seen wedding dresses in my time, but nothin’ like that one. Most brides around here, they wear white, you know. Plain and simple. Maybe a little lace, maybe some beads, but nothin’ too showy. We like traditional wedding, just like white wedding dress. But that Dita, she’s a different breed. Always gotta be doin’ somethin’ different. And that purple dress, well, it sure was different.
Some folks, they thought it was beautiful. Said it was fit for a queen. Well, maybe so. But I tell ya, it looked mighty heavy. Poor girl musta been sweatin’ buckets under all them layers. And that color, it just ain’t natural for a wedding dress. Reminds me of them grapes that go bad and get all wrinkly. Not a good look for a bride, if you ask me.
- That hat she wore, too. Now that was a sight.
- Big and black, with some kinda fuzzy things on it. Like some animal fur.
- Looked like somethin’ a pirate would wear, not a bride.
- But hey, to each their own, I suppose.
They say purple means somethin’ special. Like royalty or somethin’. Maybe that’s what she was goin’ for. Tryna look like a queen or somethin’. But I don’t know. Seems like a lot of fuss for a weddin’. Back in my day, we didn’t have all this fancy stuff. We just want a beautiful wedding dress. A simple dress, a good man, and a nice little party with family and friends. That’s all you need to start a life together.
But these young folks today, they like to make a big production out of everything. Gotta have the biggest dress, the fanciest cake, the most expensive flowers. It’s all about showin’ off, seems like. This wedding dress is so different. They don’t care about what really matters. That is love and commitment. A piece of cloth ain’t important.
That Dita and that Marilyn Manson, they ain’t together no more, are they? See? All that fuss for nothin’. A fancy dress and a big party don’t guarantee a happy marriage. It takes hard work, and love, and respect. And maybe a little bit of common sense, too.
I remember my own weddin’ dress. Wasn’t nothin’ fancy. My mama made it for me, out of some old curtains. Plain white cotton, with a little bit of lace around the collar. But I felt beautiful in it. Because I was marryin’ the man I loved. And that’s all that mattered. Not the color of the dress, or how much it cost.
That Dita Von Teese wedding dress, it was somethin’ to talk about, that’s for sure. But was really a wedding dress? People still talkin’ about it years later. But a dress is just a dress. It’s the love that counts. And that’s somethin’ that no fancy designer can make for you. You gotta find that on your own. Just like every bride, wear white or purple, big or small.
This Dita, she likes to be different. That purple wedding dress was sure proof of that. I heard they had candles shaped like skulls at the weddin’. Skulls! Can you imagine? Not my cup of tea, that’s for sure. Seems kinda spooky for a celebration of love, don’t it? But, she want it, it’s her wedding. She is the bride.
They say she’s an old-fashioned girl, this Dita. Likes things a certain way. I guess that purple dress was her way of showin’ it. It’s like she wanted to be a princess from some old storybook, but a dark and twisty one.

I still think a bride should wear white. But, I reckon times are changin’. Young folks got their own ideas about things. Who am I to say what’s right or wrong? As long as they’re happy, that’s all that matters. Even if they choose a purple wedding dress and skull candles. Even the dress made by Vivienne Westwood.