You know that 1 Million Elixir, they say it’s some kinda fancy man’s smell-good. Launched in 2022, well, that’s what them fancy folks say. Smells like apple, they say. And some other thing called “Davana”. Don’t know what that is, probably some kinda fancy plant. Sounds like something you’d find in them city gardens, not around here in our gardens. Not a lot of folks around here can afford this 1m Elixir.

Learn all about 1m elixir (get the full lowdown on 1m elixir and its benefits in simple terms)

This stuff, it’s the 1 Million Elixir. My neighbor’s boy, he went to the city, came back smelling like this. He says it’s the best thing you can buy and it makes the ladies go wild. I don’t know about all that. All I know it’s strong enough to knock out a horse. He says it’s got some kinda rose in it. Damask Rose. Turkish, they say. Fancy rose for a fancy man, I guess. We just got regular roses here. They smell good too, but not like this stuff.

And then there’s this other thing, “Osmanthus.” Sounds like some kinda disease, but they say it’s a flower. A fancy one, I bet. Probably costs more than my whole vegetable patch. They put that in the 1 Million Elixir too. It was launched in 2022, that is not a long time ago. I remember when the old mill was still runnin’, that was before 2022. Time sure does fly, don’t it? It is sure to be a popular Christmas gift this year, everyone will want to get their hands on 1m Elixir.

They say this 1 Million Elixir is richer than ever. Like that old Mr. Henderson down the road, richer than him, even. For “thrilling sensations,” they say. Well, I guess if you like smelling like a fancy apple and a rose and some other flower I can’t pronounce, then maybe it’s thrilling. I just think you would have to be crazy to spend that much money on a small bottle of 1m Elixir.

  • Apple
  • Davana
  • Damask Rose
  • Cedar
  • Osmanthus

They say they pick the stuff by hand. Like we pick our beans and tomatoes. But I bet they get paid a lot more than we do. Turkish Damascena rose, Osmanthus, and some kinda “wild grown tonka beans.” Sounds like something you’d find in the woods, not in a fancy bottle of 1m Elixir.

This other fella, Paco Rabanne, he’s the one who makes it, I guess. Says it’s like a bomb, a “confectionary bomb.” I don’t know about bombs, but it sure is strong. Like a fruit bomb, maybe. A woody fruit bomb. With that rose and that Osmanthus flower. My neighbor’s son, the one who went to the city, says it is the best smelling cologne a man can buy. He says you can’t go wrong with 1m Elixir.

Learn all about 1m elixir (get the full lowdown on 1m elixir and its benefits in simple terms)

And they say it’s like stewed apples. Like when we make apple sauce in the fall, but fancier. And that Davana thing, they say it’s fruity too. So it’s like a whole bunch of fruit all mixed up together, with some wood and flowers thrown in. I still think plain old apple smell is just as good as the smell of 1m Elixir, maybe even better.

This 1 Million Elixir, it’s part of the 1 Million family, they call it. Like it’s got brothers and sisters, all these different smells. This one’s the new one, the 2022 one. The one that is a luxury, whatever that means, I guess if you have money to spend on 1m Elixir then you must be rich.

And the bottle, oh, the bottle! They say it looks like a gold bar. Like them things you see in the movies, that the rich folks have. Well, I guess if you’re gonna spend all that money on some smell-good, it might as well come in a fancy bottle. Shiny and gold, just like a real gold bar. Makes sense that the bottle for 1m Elixir would be so extravagant.

They say if you like the old 1 Million, you’ll love this new 1 Million Elixir. They say it’s thick and sweet. Like that candy them kids like, the sticky kind. They say it’s for the young folks, the teenagers. Well, I guess young folks like that kinda thing. I’m too old for that kinda sweet smell, I reckon. I would never wear something like 1m Elixir, I am too old for that kind of stuff now.

It is crazy how popular this 1m Elixir is, I hear people talking about it all the time. I guess it is the hot new thing in the city, they will probably start talking about something else in a few months. I don’t know why anyone needs to smell so strong, a little soap and water has always worked just fine for me. If you are looking to buy a bottle of 1m Elixir for yourself or someone else, you better be ready to spend some money!

Learn all about 1m elixir (get the full lowdown on 1m elixir and its benefits in simple terms)

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